THE CHEATER BEFORE DISCOVERY AND THE CHEATER AFTER DISCOVERY: TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE

Today’s blog is written not just for you as a betrayed partner, but for your therapists, your pastors, your friends and family members, your 12-Step fellowship group members, and anyone …

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WHY WE SHERLOCK, PART 3

In Part 1 of this series on Sherlocking, we discussed the fact that early in the healing process betrayed partners tend to spy, snoop, and sleuth to find out the …

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WHY WE SHERLOCK, PART 2

You know that you sleuth, spy, and snoop to find out the truth about the betrayal in your relationship, to validate that what you have been told about the betrayal …

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Podcast Interview with Rob Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S on Understanding Complex Betrayal Trauma

  I recently had the opportunity to be interviewed by Rob Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S on his podcast called Sex, Love and Addiction 101. We talked about working with betrayed partners, explored …

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WHY WE SHERLOCK, PART 1

Yes, I did. I just turned Sherlock into a verb. Someone slap a trademark on that for me, please. As you’ve probably already guessed, what I want to talk about …

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BUT IF NOT

My sister is a potter. Well, really she is an artist and one of the ways she expresses all the pent-up artistic ability she carries around is through pottery. I …

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SETTING REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS AFTER BETRAYAL

In the aftermath of betrayal, your body and mind are struggling with an ongoing trauma response. As we have discussed elsewhere, betrayal is something that unfolds over time, and your …

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VALIDATING YOUR FEELINGS

We are not quite done with the topic of feelings. There is one more big kindness that you can show yourself around your feelings, and when you do it, it …

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CREATING SPACE FOR YOUR FEELINGS

We live in a culture that does not approve of big feelings. We don’t approve of little feelings very much either. All the feelings that we have are supposed to …

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The Secret to Recovery: Slow Down to go Faster

Last year, a group of my friends and I decided to work through a book by Tara Mohr called Playing Big. This book is for women who want to play …

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