A facilitated, carefully prepared and supported process where the unfaithful individual provides their partner with a fully honest account of their history of acting out behaviors.
During disclosure, couples enter into a carefully prepared, intentional, therapeutically supported process designed to help them to re-establish a foundation of honesty and safety in their relationship, and to begin to repair and heal the attachment injuries created by the betrayal.
In this process, the cheating partner comes prepared to vulnerably tell the entire truth about the scope and depth of the betrayal that has occurred and to take responsibility for the pain and wounding that these behaviors have created for their significant other. The betrayed partner comes prepared to listen and to ask questions in order to fully explore and understand the betrayal they have experienced, and to be able to make decisions about moving forward in the relationship with full awareness of who their partner is and what has occurred.
The Disclosure Prep Online Course
- Provides both individuals with the same information at the same time (limiting increased distress from misinformation or misunderstandings about the process that can arise when details are communicated separately to each person in individual therapy).
- Levels the playing field (preventing one partner from knowing information about this sensitive process that the other partner does not yet have).
- Takes the mystery out of the process (decreasing anxiety arising from uncertainty about exactly when and how the process will unfold).
- Places disclosure within a context of hope and healing (separating disclosure from the traumatic discovery events that couples experienced when the betrayal was first uncovered).
- Empowers the couple (enabling both individuals to enter the disclosure process fully informed, prepared, and supported).
- Helps couples move through the process more quickly and efficiently (beginning preparatory work during the course, including setting your intention for disclosure and committing to a timeframe for completion of disclosure).
- Disclosure is viewed as the beginning of repair (helping the couple to see disclosure as a pivotal turning point it the relationship, moving them toward repair and healing of the attachment injuries they have suffered).
Designed for couples to complete together
This course is designed to be watched and completed together as a couple. The topic of disclosure can provoke fear and anxiety for each individual, making it tempting to avoid addressing the topic together as a couple. However, after delivering this course to countless couples, we can say with absolute confidence that watching the content and completing the course exercises together as a couple is a vital beginning step toward a successful disclosure.
The Relational Recovery Model
This course presents the Relational Recovery model for facilitating therapeutic disclosures developed by Michelle Mays LPC, CSAT-S. There are other well-developed models for facilitating disclosure available and your therapist may or may not use the Relational Recovery model in their practice. However, this course will give you, the client, a thorough understanding of the elements that should be included in the disclosure process and will equip you to advocate for what you and your partner need during preparation, giving, receiving and healing from disclosure.
The Disclosure Prep Course includes the following content:
- Video presentation: covering the following information: the three-phase process of disclosure, steps and tasks to prepare both individuals for disclosure, concrete instructions about how to write and prepare a disclosure document including both what to include and not include, information about the role and use of polygraphs, a detailed overview of the disclosure event, self-care planning before, during and after the disclosure and much more.
- Course Exercises: the course is designed with exercises throughout the presentation. Couples are directed to stop the video and work together to complete specific exercises that help them to come together regarding their expectations, hopes and commitments around the giving and receiving of disclosure.
- Preparatory Worksheets: included with the course content are a set of preparatory worksheets for both the betrayed partner and the unfaithful partner. These worksheets help walk the person through the process of preparing for the disclosure and should be worked on in individual therapy after completing the Disclosure Prep course.
- Sample Disclosure: also included is a sample disclosure document that provides a concrete example of what a solid disclosure document looks like.